I spend the majority of my day advising individuals and families on protecting and preserving their wealth in case of incapacitation and death. To some, it may seem like an exercise of drafting A LOT of documents with a lot of words, mostly legalese. I often hear, does it take all of this or can we leave that out? Better yet, can I just write what I want to happen down and have it witnessed and notarized?

Having administered many estates over the years, some well-planned, others that are incomplete, and most with no plans at all, I am concerned. Knowing what you want to happen is very different than it actually happening when the time comes. Anybody can write their vision down on paper, however; it takes the extra questions, additional wording, organizing your assets and debt, reflecting on your family dynamics and considering the applicable laws in your state to ensure your plan will work when you need it.

Trust me, estate planning is much, much more than a check the box exercise i.e. I have a Will or Trust. In addition to putting your wishes in writing, it is also about thinking through your familial responsibilities, financial obligations and asset ownership and management so your loved ones know exactly what should happen next. It’s like preparing a playbook for life! 

I’ve sat with a number of spouses who could have benefited from the preparation of a playbook.  Try finding out after the death of your husband or wife that your name isn’t on the Deed and now you have to ask your stepson for permission to stay in your home. Ouch! Or, families in the mist of a crisis trying to obtain power of attorney over their loved ones’ assets. And then there is the debt left behind threatening the family home. It’s scary just thinking about it. 

Yes, it is daunting and most would prefer not talking about it anyway. And yes, it is an uncomfortable topic.  But, don’t skip the process of planning. It is truly an act of love to put your affairs in order. Your loved ones will thank you.